Christmas 2010 in review

About a couple of weeks ago, we witnessed a short-lived phenomenon in Texas: autumn colors and changing leaves! Here's our pear tree, with its bright orange leaves; it was so beautiful, for the week or so that it lasted. Now the leaves are gone...After that we saw a different sort of tree- a 30 ft Christmas tree in downtown Fort Worth. Sadly, the picture came out a bit blurry.The lights of downtown are so breathtaking this time of year. One of our favorite things to do together is walk down the cobblestone paths, and enjoy the streetlights.My sisters flew in for the holiday and we spent Christmas Eve together, eating ham and potatoes, exchanging presents, and playing games. Aunt Kristi got in some quality cuddle time with Jack.Aunt Teri got some snuggles too.Jon and I dutifully posed in front of the Christmas tree, with me looking a bit rounder than normal (pictured here at 22 wks prg)Daddy opening J's presents. We did our gift exchange at night, so Jack was a little tired to be too into it.On Christmas Day we went over to Jon's sister's house and spent the day with his family. Can you believe I don't have any pictures of this? We took a family portrait, so I'll upload that when I can. Jack's present from Mommy and Daddy?--a shiny, red tricycle! He loves it; he refuses to try the pedals, instead opting for the "Flintstones" method of scooting. Whatever works, right? Short video of Jack riding his trike in the driveway. FYI, the first few seconds are the best. Unfortunately, my phone was retarded and deleted the longer video of him performing for me by mistake.

Christmas night- we went downtown with my parents and sisters and ate...what else, but tasty Mexican. Afterwards, Jon and Jack gazed at the Christmas lights outside.Kristi, Teri, and IAnother blurry shot, still figuring out my new phone's camera. The pink ornament in the middle was about 6 feet tall.Jon, Jack, and me. I had a crisper version of this picture, but my phone yet again deleted the wrong picture and left me with the blurry one. Oh my gosh, possibly the best video ever. Jack entertaining us downtown, dancing and running. No one got him started on this, he just spontaneously started performing.

Awesome Christmas gift from Aunt T, an easel paired with an assortment of crafty supplies. Here is Jack in his artist "smock" (my old tee); I love how it goes down to his ankles. He has created many masterpieces for us over the past few days. Of course Jack wasn't the only one to receive presents this year. Jon got a new game for his Xbox, cell phone, some clothes, and best of all....$$. I got cute maternity wear, boots, cell phone, and a zoo membership for 2011. We had a wonderful time sharing memories with both sides of the family and are grateful that we have a long New Year's weekend to recover and rest. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year's to everyone out there! Hope ya'll have a safe and fun weekend.

Quite the predicament

"Do you have your wallet?"-- Jon asked me in a skeptical voice.

1 HOUR EARLIER:

It was a normal Tuesday, just like any other Tuesday before. Jack and I were doing our daily activities, when I received an interesting text from Jon- he had forgotten his wallet at home, and was short on gas, so there was a possibility that I'd need meet him to buy gas for the car. Okay, no problem. Moving on. It's now 4:15 in the afternoon- the time of day that every mom out there dreads, you're tired and want a break from the kid(s), it's coming up on dinner time, and you're just waiting for Daddy to come home. Basically from 4-5 pm, I try to kill time. So Jack and I went outside, going thru our garage, to check the mail. Afterwards, I let Jack ride his ride-along truck along the sidewalk, while I talk to Jon on the phone, who is now on his way home from work. I didn't make it to the store that day, so I told Jon that we were going to eat at a pizza buffet. Excited at the prospect of not cooking and stuffing my face full of pizza, I was in a happy mood.

Then Jon arrives home, pulling his car into the garage. We chatted for a few minutes about our day, and then Jon goes to go inside. And this is where my mood shifted. "You know this door is locked right?," he asks me. "No, in fact, I didn't know that actually, because I didn't lock it, and that's really quite terrible because I don't have a key for that door," I think to myself. Jon notices the keys in my hand and thinks I'm playing a joke. "These are the keys for the front and back doors, and they're both deadbolted from the inside!," I say in a slightly raised voice. In a vain attempt to hope we can miraculously will the deadbolts to slide unlocked, we try the key on the front and back doors......stubbornly they refuse to open. Hmmmm, thinking, thinking, I guess we'll just call a locksmith. I call the locksmith and am told to wait for the "technician" to call me back "shortly." I'm not sure what "shortly" means exactly, but in a situation like this, I'd appreciate a definition. It turns out it means 25 minutes. The guy calls to tell me he should be here in 30-35 minutes. I get off the phone with him, and turn to Jon and suggest we kill time by going out to eat dinner. He agrees with me, and then skeptically, yet with a hint of hope in his eye asks, "Do you have your wallet?" Sadly, and honestly at this point, a little comically I answer, "No, it's inside." Now we start laughing. I'm mad at him that he left his wallet at home, and he's mad at me I didn't grab mine before checking the mail. Jack, meanwhile, continues to ride his truck up and down the driveway, happily oblivious to our predicament.

We decide to let Jack drive his truck around the block a few times to kill the half hour long wait, which was effective until it got dark. Now we are back in the garage, huddled in the car, waiting... Did I mention that the light switch for our overhead garage light is located INside the laundry room and as the sun is setting we must resort to shutting and opening the garage door to get some light?! There's nothing like that to make you feel ghetto. Finally, the "technician" arrives and tells us "No problem, I'll get you in your house, and won't even damage your door." Thank-you, hallelujah! 10 minutes, and 5 openings/closings of the garage door to get light later, he is still trying to pick the lock and get us inside. Now I'm officially worried. It's completely dark outside, starting to get cold, we have NO money, Jack's things (like diapers) are inside, and the expert technician is unable to pick the lock. He alerts us that the lock is broken, he can't possibly pick it, and he'll have to break the knob. Luckily it's an old knob that we were planning on replacing, so we say, "just do it!" 2 minutes later, and we're in our house! And just think, it only cost us $74 including tax.

Honestly, the situation was rather humorous. My main frustration stemmed from the fact that our vacuum cleaner broke, the water heater died, and our year and a half old tv needed repairs........ all in the past 2 weeks! And I had to pay a guy to break my door knob, how irritating. Could this not have waited until after Christmas?

More news...

Over the past couple of months, Jack has been sporting a new shirt around town. What makes this shirt so special? Take a look---->

That's right! We're pregnant! And super excited and a little terrified of what adding baby #2 means for our family. I am most excited about seeing Jack with his baby BROTHER and the two of them becoming friends, rough-housing, and getting into trouble together. I hope they have a special bond to last thru the years. We found out today that we are having another boy, so that puts me right at half-way and due on April 30th. I was sincerely shocked when they said "boy" to me; I had convinced myself it was a girl. I think right up until the final seconds before the sonographer said the word, then I couldn't imagine "girl" escaping her lips and I thought "boy." But I am thrilled, and Jon is even more so. I am so happy for Jack; he really needs another boy in the family to wrestle with and throw around. And I love little boys- there is just something so sweet about raising a boy, knowing they're going to be big men someday. Okay, enough of that....below are sonogram pics of baby.

This pic is from Oct. 15, so baby is 12 weeks here. These pics are from today, so baby is just shy of 20 weeks. Baby is healthy and growing as he should. We are so happy and grateful, and now I know that baby is a boy, I'm turning my thoughts to decorating! I'm open to suggestions for color palettes; baby's room is already a silver gray, so I'm thinking of colors to coordinate with that.

Progressing quickly...

Jack had a fantastic audiology appointment this last Wednesday. He went in for his 2 week follow-up to his initial stimulation, so at this point he'd been "turned on" for 2 weeks. Remember that he was hearing a full range of sounds, but only at high volumes, so he really wasn't hearing too much. We were told that it would take a couple of months for him to reach the "normal" hearing range where he heard everything. Well....imagine our surprise when his audiologist programmed it so he was extremely close to the normal hearing range! He should be at "normal hearing" in the next week. She was able to program it this quickly because he responded so well to the sounds she presented him. Imagine if you'd never heard a certain sound before in your life; once you heard it, would you recognize it as an important sound and respond to it? That's how it is with Jack; he is learning that sound is important and has meaning. So for him to respond to whisper-quiet sounds is a miracle!

We went into the sound booth where they test hearing by playing a wide range of sounds, and Jack responded consistently to nearly ALL of them. It was amazing to witness and truly the only word that comes to mind is, miraculous. Only 2 months earlier we sat in that same booth and Jack failed to respond to the loudest of sounds. Once equipped with his hearing aids, he responded to about 1/3- 1/2 the sounds. With his cochlear implant, he responded to about 90% of the sounds...including sounds that were so quiet, I was questioning they were actually putting sound out. I'm talking about sounds that are comparable to the breeze....and this is only 2 weeks since being stimulated! His audiologist was so excited and said he did so well; I looked at her, like "uh-huh, thanks," because what else is she going to say? She sensed my hesitation, and was like, "No, you don't understand. He was amazing! He is progressing very quickly and to respond consistently the way he did is awesome." She called him her superstar and said he was in her top two of patients because of how he performed in the sound booth. It's really interesting how they train kids to respond to sound. We have a bucket of balls and Jack holds 1 ball up to his ear, indicating he is listening; once he detects a sound, he throws the ball in the bucket. And the process starts over again; he did this for about 15 mins in the booth and was incredible, he's so smart.

So anyways, in case you can't tell, we're super excited about this and so grateful. Jack is just so special and watched over by his Heavenly Father. I can literally see His hand in Jack's life in his short 2 1/2 years of being on this earth.

B-I-G Changes

Jack had a fun new arrival a couple of weeks ago....a new big boy bed! He LOVES it, oh my gosh. He literally races me to his bedroom at naptime, pushing me out of the way. And after bathtime with Daddy, he no longer comes out to give me kisses; he stays in his room, climbs into bed and waits to be covered. He loves climbing in and out of the bed all by himself, and then lays his head on the pillow, waiting to be covered up. I was so anxious about him leaving his crib, worrying about him getting out of bed and not sleeping; but the wonderful part is, he stays in the bed and sleeps no problem- then after waking up, he waits for you to come get him! Hallelujah. I'm betting that since he's the only child he doesn't know his options about getting up and roaming around. Oh well, I'm enjoying it while it lasts. It's so fun to sneak in and peek at him while he's sleeping; the bed dwarfs him and you never know what position you'll find him in.

He is too adorable here, he was sleeping like a baby with his legs tucked under himself and the blanket covering him.

A new car pillow for a new bed. While at Target picking out sheets, he found their collection of car bedding and insisted on "driving" the pillow around the store, while on his knees.

Perfect example of my cuddly boy, snuggling his pillow.

Stay tuned, an update on Jack's latest audiology appointment is coming soon.....

CI Initial Stimulation

Jack had his cochlear implant's "initial stimulation" this past Wednesday. Basically that means he got "turned on." His audiologist ran a series of tests on the implant's electrodes (which are inside his cochlea) to "map" his hearing range and program his processor (what is worn behind the ear). He gave some good, obvious responses to the sounds, enabling her to better program the equipment. There is, I think a perception out there that the process is magic- meaning that not only does he all of a sudden hear everything, but he understands what he hears. I wish this is how it happened! The reality is, it is a process. Right now he has access to the full range of sounds, low to high frequency, but has a limited range on volume. He is only hearing loud sounds. Over the next few weeks, he will progress through different hearing programs and gradually hear softer sounds and nuances. This is so he isn't overwhelmed and will leave the processor on his head; he needs the time to adjust to hearing so much. After the first several weeks, his processor will then be "fine-tuned" to make sure the sounds coming thru are correct; for example, the "s" sound is the most difficult speech sound to hear, so this is where the fine-tuning comes into play. After the first few months, Jack will be on a regular program which stays the same and he will hear everything.

Jack's new processor; we chose the chocolate brown to blend with his hair, I think once his hair *finally* thickens up it'll look even better.

How does it work?? The processor is behind the ear and receives the sounds, which then travel thru the cable, up to the coil (the round part on top), going directly to the electrodes inside the cochlea, stimulating the hearing nerve and sending the signals directly to the brain, allowing him to perceive sound. The coil doesn't defy gravity as it may seem-- it holds to his head with a magnet, connecting to the magnet placed inside his head during surgery. It swipes off easily enough and he doesn't sleep in the equipment. (I've had some people ask me if he would be able to take off the equipment once put on, like it would be permanently attached to his head.)The stuffed koala bear Jack received with his equipment. I thought it was too clever; it's a "deaf" koala and comes with its own toy processor for Jack to play with and place on koala's head.
Jack really enjoys putting the processor on koala. He immediately made the connection between the toy processor to the one he wears.

Over the past few days, Jack has done very well with his CI. He leaves it alone and tries to fix it when it gets knocked out of place. At first, when initially stimulated, he stopped responding to his name when called; I'm sure it sounded weird to him and he didn't recognize the sound. After a few days, he is responding about half the time now when I call his name; so I can see definite improvement. He also learned the word "slow" yesterday when Daddy played cars with him. He showed him how to move his cars "fast!" and "sloooow." Jack started saying "ohhh" when Daddy modeled "slow." To check his comprehension of the word, I had our cars going fast, and then said "slow," to which Jack immediately made his car go slow. It's moments like that which make this whole process worth it and encourage us to keep going. I know that he is hearing and learning, and that's what it's all about.

Autumn activities

Last month we visited a nearby pumpkin patch after hearing great things about it. It did not disappoint! Not only was it huge, but it offered a variety of *free* activities. Located on a family farm, there were countless pumpkins to choose from, as you can see.... Jack's favorite part was the wagon ride from the parking lot to the farm. He hated leaving the wagon behind.

You can see him longingly looking after the wagon here, ignoring the camera.

Smile Jack!

They offered hayrides, which was fun, except it irritated poor Jon's allergies.

They had atleast 5 bounce houses, and one specifically just for toddlers. Jack was just starting to get the hang of it when he got knocked over, and then he was done.

Log cabin- open and close the windows and repeat.

Jon and Jack in jail, where they belong.

They had these fun cardboard cutouts all over the place including the most current ones from recent movies.

Toddler hay maze, unfortunately Jack took just the right route to get out, so our search took like a minute.

After the visit to the pumpkin patch, it was time to get ready for Halloween!

"Safari Jack" on an adventure at the church carnival

Jack on the stage, monopolizing the bowling game; you can see his friend behind him also monopolizing the game. Jack refused to release the ball from a distance; he had to walk right up to the pins and throw the ball at them.

Jack in the white shirt on the left, doing the cupcake walk. Once he got the hang of it, he ran the circle repeatedly, laughing the whole time. Just kept running.

Mimi & Pappaw came with us, it was my Dad's b-day too.Jon and I, we didn't dress up. I spent my creative energy assembling Jack's costume. Halloween night, outside our house. Jon and Jack are ready to go trick-or-treating.

Post-Halloween, I have learned that my son is a candy/chocolate-aholic. He goes in search of his candy and once found, doesn't give up until he gets some. Among his favorites: m&m's and dum-dums. Jon is also a candy freak; I foresee problems in the future as Jack gets old enough to defend his stash from his dad.

Post-Op

Jack had his CI surgery on Monday; it was successful with zero problems! What a relief. We checked into the hospital at 5:30 a.m. and he went into anesthesia around 7 a.m. They began actually operating at 8, and were done by 9:45, which was a little faster than we were expecting. We got to go back to the recovery room to see our little man, thinking he would be awake, but he was fast asleep, knocked out by all the medicine. The nurse asked if we wanted to hold him or keep him in bed, and I said "hold him!" Little did I know I'd be holding him for the next hour and a half, arm cramping, while he snored loudly. This kid showed NO signs of waking up anytime soon. So we opted to let him lay in bed so we could sneak off to eat some lunch. Jon and I ate cheeseburgers, relaxing some, afterwards returning to our boy who was still asleep. We wanted to return home the same day so we could rest at home instead of a hospital, so the nurses said it was time to wake him up and get him to eat a popsicle. He was so adorable and groggy, with this head band wrapped around his head. He looked like a ninja or the Karate Kid. He gladly sucked on the popsicle and kept it down. So we were released and left the hospital around 2 p.m. We had definitely been there long enough!

Jack slept about 4 hours on the couch when we got home, for which I was very grateful. I slept on the floor next to him and enjoyed a lazy afternoon. He never cried once, but did have a glazed-over, mean look in his eye attesting to his discomfort. He needed to keep the headband on, which held the gauze in place over his ear, for the next 24 hours, so we decided to have him sleep in our bed. I knew that thing would never survive a night alone with Jack. He had already tried to rip it off once. What a restless night! We have a king-size bed, but you wouldn't believe it sleeping with Jack. He started off next to Jon and ended up next to me, with me having a total of 10 inches of space before I fell to the floor. And he was so restless, moving and shifting and sighing for hours. I eventually moved to the couch, leaving Jon to fend for himself. Jack slept peacefully in the early morning hours, at which point I was so grateful it was just about time to get up and take off that headband!

So we took off the headband, and the incision looked pretty good. Truthfully I was expecting much more swelling and redness, but he looked like normal Jack, just with an incision by his ear. Tuesday he was still tired, and laid in our bed all morning (which I kind of enjoyed!) and he napped in our bed too. By the afternoon he was more energetic and played with toys, but took rest breaks to cuddle Mommy (enjoyed that too). And by Wednesday he was his normal Jack self; you would never guess he had surgery 2 days prior. I took a picture of "ninja" Jack on my cell phone, but not our camera, so I'll have to figure out how to get it on the computer.

In a little less than 3 weeks, Jack will see his audiologist and get "turned on," meaning he'll get his processor and have it adjusted. It will be another few weeks before they turn him on fully- where he hears everything; this is so all the sound won't overwhelm him. We are excited to get the equipment and see the difference in Jack. Thanks for all your support and prayers; they mean so much and we're very grateful. In the meantime, check back for Halloween pictures!

It's time to share

I have been terrible lately with blogging, and I am determined to catch up and re-commit myself. The main reason I haven't updated is because I wasn't ready to share. Over the past several months we have been worried over Jack's speech development, because he wasn't talking. He would babble for several days in-a-row, then quit for several weeks, never progressing past that point. We finally had a hearing test done about 2 months ago, and the results were shocking. Jack has a severe to profound hearing loss, which basically means he's deaf. It was really hard to hear such a diagnosis and I was in denial about it for days afterward, refusing to believe it could be that bad. I mean, how could we have not known? His newborn hearing screen was normal and he babbled as a baby, and he is very convincing at following directions and doing what you tell him. It turns out, he's super smart and figures out what you want thru other cues.

I wanted to post an entry about this for weeks now, but couldn't make myself sit down and do it. I guess I wasn't ready for the rest of the world to know yet. If you know me, you know I have a tendency to down-play things so I can remain more optimistic about it. I'm not the type who calls all her friends and cries about it. When Jack was born, he stayed in the NICU for 1 month and 1 day, and nearly died. I never told any one about the seriousness of the situation until after he came home, when it was all clear and no worries. I think that's something I need to change; it's just not healthy to deal with it all on your own. Anyways, the doctors suspect that his hearing loss is a result of the aggressive antibiotics received during the NICU stay. It's frustrating to think about that, but it's easier when I consider he wouldn't be alive if not for those medicines and treatment.

So what's the plan for Jack? He has been in hearing aids for 7 weeks now, and is scheduled for a cochlear implant surgery on Monday, the 25th. I am thrilled that we have this option available to us; with it, Jack will be able to hear within the classified "normal" range, and I am told that he will even be able to hear whispering. With his hearing aids, Jack is in a mild to moderate hearing loss range; the difference in him the past 2 months has truly been amazing. He knows my voice now and looks for me when I talk. You cannot imagine how much you take hearing for granted, until your child cannot hear. It's a miracle to me and I feel true joy when Jack responds to my voice. With just 2 months of hearing Jack is learning that sounds are important and have meaning. He is imitating everything we do, and tries to talk like we do. He knows that specific sounds are appropriate for the toys he plays with; for example, cars go "beep, beep" and airplanes go "ahhhh" (according to his speech therapist). He says "mama" for "more," and "ba-ba" for "bye-bye." He is thriving with the limited hearing he has now. That is why I am so excited to see him once he has full access to sound, with his cochlear implant. He is having his left ear done first, and then, within a few months, we will decide if we will implant the right ear.

I feel as if I were being prepared for this years ago. I grew up with a dad who was very hard-of-hearing, who eventually got a cochlear implant. Additionally, I took ASL (sign language) classes for 2 years in college. For a normal hearing girl, I have a fair amount of knowledge about the deaf community and sign. I remember learning all about deaf culture in college, and specifically about this controversial procedure with a cochlear implant. The deaf see it as a negative, as if you were taking one of their own deaf children away from their community. Sign language is a valid option, and if it were 20 years ago, I would have zero problem with Jack signing. Our family would learn to sign and communicate in that way. But the fact is, it's not 20 years ago and cochlear implants are very, very good. The implant inside the cochlea is designed with extra "space" so no further surgeries are needed to update the device; you update the external processor (what's worn behind the ear) and that's it. Why wouldn't I choose this option for my son? The fact is that I want him to live as normal a life as possible. I don't want him to struggle in school or to feel like an outsider. How often do you see a person signing, and you go and strike up a conversation with them? You don't. You don't know how. That person is perfectly capable and social, but you don't know how to communicate with each other, without feeling awkward. With this implant, Jack will never know this dilemna. He can be mainstreamed in school, and talk with his hearing friends. I am so grateful for this technology, and feel so blessed.

We have excellent medical people, including his audiologist and speech therapist to guide us through this process. We have a family who loves Jack more than the world, and gives us continual support. We know this journey will be long and at times, difficult, but I know that everything will be okay and that most importantly, Jack will be okay. I thank Heavenly Father that Jack will never know the difference between natural hearing and electronic hearing. For him, it will all be natural and the sounds lovely. He can grow up in primary and sing during their sacrament programs. These are all things I look forward to. He is truly so smart, and has such a happy, joyful attitude, that I know the sky is the limit for him.

so much to catch up on...

The past month has been so crazy that I neglected blogging, and I'm sure, all of my many adoring fans out there. Apologies to you few! I'll post more on why it's been so crazy the next time around, because this post is dedicated to the cuteness that is Jack. He has become so much more of a helper lately and an independent little man- I never cease to be impressed by him.

Here is Jack helping with the laundry. I gave him the full laundry basket, and he knew just what to do with it:

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Here is Jack helping Daddy mow the lawn. (I know his dad really appreciated it!)

Here is Jack showing me how a bike is meant to be ridden. (note: I originally tried to put him on his attached toddler seat so I could ride the bike, but he knew where the better seat was and insisted on sitting THERE)

We went around the block like this- me balancing the bike while he cruised. I am thinking it's about time for his own tricycle.
Jack demonstrating how to swipe a credit card.
Jack using the "credit card" (I don't think I'm quite ready for him to master this skill)

Jack showin' how it's done, miniature golf style.

While golfing, after I hit my ball I'd have to race to beat Jack to get in my second putt, or else he'd pick up the ball and return it to me. Ever so helpful.

Jack mastering the art of tee-ball while riding a truck:

I'm not sure how much everyone else will appreciate this video since you can't see the video Jack is dancing to, but I love it! He's copying the monkeys from the website playhousedisney.com as they dance some funky monkey moves. My favorite is when his hands are overhead, mouth w-i-d-e open, and head shaking. I laugh every. single. time.

Jack is growing up so fast that I feel overwhelmed trying to capture all of the memories. He is such a good and sweet boy; we're truly blessed to have him. I think his terrible-two's phase lasted about a month, which is witness to his sweet temperament. Case in point: while picking up diapers at Babies 'r' Us the other day we let Jack ride around on a really fun tricycle. He loved it! The only problem was that it was time to put it back up. We tried to coax him off the bike and upon Daddy returning it to the aisle, Jack started to cry. I luckily was struck with inspiration and gave the trike back to Jack and asked him to put it away. He quietly and no-fuss put the trike where it belonged and walked away. I am just so impressed by him! I love you Jack!